According to Snyder (1987), self-monitoring is the tendency for a person to regulate their behavior to meet the demands of social situations. As someone who is moderately high on the Self-Monitoring Scale (Snyder, 1987), I had wondered what it would be like to live a day where I didn't change my behavior to fit the situation I was in. In order to implement this change, I went through the whole day as if I didn't give a hoot what others thought of me. As a mild self monitor, this was rather difficult and I often had to just turn my social brain off and just roll with whatever was happening.
One situation where it was really obvious that I was not self monitoring was at work. First off, I showed up without my work shirt. Instead I wore my work shorts and shoes with a Grey v-neck t shirt. When my manager asked where my shirt was, I told him it was in my car, but I didn't feel like wearing it because it was way too big for me (which it is) and the shirt I was wearing was more comfortable (which it was). I had always wondered what would happen if I did something like that, because my manager is kind of a push-over, but I had never taken the notion seriously because wearing my work shirt was the proper thing to do in that situation. Not surprisingly, he just shrugged off my comment and didn't make a huge deal about me being out of uniform. After that, I continued my low self-monitoring streak by not adapting my language to fit where I was. I'm pretty abrasive to myself and around people I know well, because they know I mean no harm by what I say. However, when I'm at work I tone the madness down and just shrug off whatever weird stuff my co-workers say, and just go with the flow. However, with my self-monitoring turned way down it was on like donkey kong. One of my co-workers called me a hipster (note: I don't especially like hipsters, actually they make me pretty angry) because of my wardrobe choice, and seemingly out of nowhere I tore into him about what his choice of vehicle, a lifted ford f-150, said about the size of his gentleman’s parts. This caught him a little off guard, but he soon recovered and we went back and forth like that all night. It was fun having a little bit of a pissing contest with him, and good times were had by all. At one point a co-worker asked if I was on drugs because I seemed “a lot more energetic than normal”. I told him no, I was just letting loose a little bit. He said he thought I should keep doing drugs, because it was fun to watch me mess with people like I was doing.
Before I undertook this adventure, I was pretty nervous that people would misunderstand my cutting remarks and think that I was being serious, but as my day progressed I noticed that nobody really took anything I said too seriously, which was nice. I have often chided myself for being a little slow on the uptake in social situations, but seeing my behavior I realize that rather than taking forever to say anything, I'm taking forever to say something that I think people will like to hear. I think in the future I could use this to my advantage, altering my level of self monitoring in certain situations so as not to just fade into the background like I usually do. After being a low self-monitor for a day, I learned that my self-concept is built largely on my being a mid-to-high self-monitor, because I felt like a completely different person than I usually was. Apparently my self-concept is rather malleable, because after changing one part of that self-concept I changed a lot of how I viewed myself as a social being. I would actually consider making this a permanent change if I didn't know that there are people out there who don't really appreciate my brand of cutting humor (ironically, I seem to be related to a good number of these types). Also, I'm pretty sure I'd get myself into some pretty deep trouble in more structured social settings if I just let myself go like that all the time.
Snyder, M. (1987). Public appearances/private realities: The psychology of self-monitoring. New York: Freeman
hahaha Mama Chat always told me as i was growing up that big trucks were driven by "silly boys with small penises--nothin' but small penises". haha i think it's awesome that you called your coworker out about that.
ReplyDeleteas far as self-monitoring goes, i am a very high self-monitorer also, which is why i think my project was so difficult too. but it seems like you were able to lower your monitoring quite a bit--very impressive!